Hospital Gripes

As most of you know, I had a great trip to the ER on Sunday morning... I had a stomach virus pretty bad on Friday night through Saturday morning. This led me to have some awful cramps both Saturday and Sunday.

Of course, I became super paranoid that it wasn't just the virus finishing with me, but that really it was something wrong with the baby. Made me very jittery and nervous.

So, I went into the ER. I was pretty impressed with the check in process. I came in, sat down, they took me back for triage stuff, peed in a cup and sat back down to wait to go back.

Hmm... that guy came in after me... he isn't bleeding and it doesn't look like anything physically wrong with him, hmm... wonder why he gets to go back first. They must be still waiting for my pee results. Be patient, Melissa.

Oh... that is my name. Let's go back. Sit here, somebody will be right with you. Well, wait... let's move you to a 'real' room (not the cloth divider rooms) since they may have to do an exam on you. Go ahead and strip from the waist down. You can cover with this *warmed* blanket.

So, I get stuck in this little bitty room back away from all of the other rooms. I am thinking... wow, this is nice. I am not too close to any ER germs and real rooms must be more important than divider rooms.

WRONG!

After thirty more minutes of waiting, finally somebody remembers I am there. In comes the doctor... a lady who, apparently, wants to talk about every baby she has ever delivered. Takes my history... again... and tells me she is going to order some tests. Tells me I am smart for bringing my iPod to give me something to do.... I have less than 50% battery strength.

Fifteen minutes later... Nurse comes in with a fetal heart monitor. This is really the only reason I came in... to make sure baby is still okay. Baby heartbeat at a good 153 bpm. Alright... now I am ready to go home. This is what I was worried about. But no... gotta wait.

Another thirty minutes goes by. In comes the nurse to take my blood. Now, I am not squeamish about giving blood/having my blood drawn. I cannot watch, though... don't want to see it. I have pretty thin blood, so it usually doesn't take very long. So, nurse sticks me, I feel the pressure of her holding the needle-apparatus-thing in place and hear her say something like "oh wow" and all pressure lifts from my arm. Now, I am thinking 'I filled the vial up quick' and I look down. What do I see?!? Blood gushing all over and the needle still in my arm! I mean blood EVERYWHERE -- the floor, the blanket, the nurse, everywhere. Nurse couldn't get it to stop! She got her vial of blood and pulled the needle-apparatus-thing out, even though she was supposed to keep it in, in case I needed an IV. Then she leaves me with this tiny little square of gauze and tells me to hold it on until it stops bleeding. HELLO?!? Be patient, Melissa.

So, I find myself sitting, pants-less with a freezing, bloody blanket (because warmed blankets don't stay that way) holding a piece of gauze soaked in my blood. Breathe, Melissa.

An hour and forty five minutes later... still sitting. I decide to put my pants on and open the door, in the slim chance that somebody may come by this way and tell me where the bathroom is. My iPod battery line is almost to that dreaded 'red' part. I guess I should stop listening to book on tape and playing solitaire both... seems to drain the battery faster. Breathe, Melissa.

Ten minutes later, the doctor comes back in...

I'm waiting on one more test result, but everything looks fine. I didn't want you to think I forgot about you. Sure... the bathroom is right over here (two doors away from where I was). Be patient, Melissa.

Thirty minutes later, finally with an empty bladder, another nurse comes in with my discharge paperwork. She gives me another piece of gauze for my arm and tapes it down so I don't have to hold it. Where was she two hours ago?!? iPod in red zone.

So, just at four hours from start to finish. What was wrong, you ask?!? The stomach virus seems to have dehydrated you. We would give you an IV, but you had such problems with the needle-apparatus-thing that we don't want to stick you again. You need to drink more water.

Oh My Gosh!

I guess I shouldn't complain. Our insurance will pay for it all... even when it is only for my peace of mind that I go in. I do consider myself lucky that there was nothing wrong with me or baby. I guess I should consider myself lucky for being able to go with no worry. But seriously, four hours to tell me to drink more water?!?